I was reading an article on "Opposites Attract" the other day which suggested ways of chatting up women.

As an example they used Bill Wyman who is short and said when he was at a party he used to go up to the tallest and say "I know you are the tallest woman here..".

So I thought I'd give it a go, but of course I couldn't use the short bit.

So I went up to this woman and said "I know you are the fattest bird here.."

Well it didn't work!