> > >
> > > Usually everyone who has a dog would call the dog Rover or
something.
>I
> > > call mine "Sex". Sex is a very embarrassing name, but I never knew
HOW
> > > embarrassing until one day I took Sex for a walk and he ran away
from
> > me.
> > I
> > > spent hours looking for him. A police officer came along and asked
me
> > what
> > > I was doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in the morning. I said, "I > > > was
> > > looking for Sex."
> > >
> > > My court case comes up next Thursday.
> > >
> > > One day I went to City Hall to get a license for Sex. The clerk
asked
>me
> > > what I wanted, I told him I wanted a license for Sex. He said "I
would
> > like
> > > to have one too!" When I said "But this is a dog," he said he > > > didn't
> > care
> > > what she looked like. Then I said, "You don't understand. I've had
Sex
> > > since I was two years old."
> > >
> > > He replied, "You must have been a strong boy."
> > >
> > > When I decided to get married, I told the minister that I wanted > > > to
>have
> > > Sex at the wedding. He told me to wait until after the wedding. I
>said,
> > > "But Sex has played a big part in my life and my whole lifestyle
> > revolves
> > > around Sex."
> > >
> > > He said he did not want to hear about my personal life and would > > > not
> > marry
> > > us in a church. I told him everyone coming to the wedding would
enjoy
> > > having Sex there. The next day we were married by the Justice of > > > the
> > Peace.
> > > My family is barred from the church.
> > >
> > > My wife and I took the dog along with us on the honeymoon. When I
> > checked
> > > into the motel I told the clerk that I wanted a room for my wife > > > and
> > myself
> > > and a special room for Sex. The clerk said that every room in the
>Motel
> > is
> > > for Sex. Then I said, "You don't understand. Sex keeps me awake at
> > night",
> > > and the clerk said,"Me too."
> > >
> > > One day I told my friend that I had Sex on TV. He said, "Show > > > off!"
I
> > told
> > > him it was a contest, and he told me I should have sold tickets.
> > >
> > > When my wife and I separated we went to court to fight for custody
of
> > the
> > > dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married" and the
>Judge
> > > said, "Me too."
> > >
> > > When I told him that after I was married Sex had left me, he said,
"Me
> > > too."
> > >
> > > Well now I've been thrown in jail, been married, divorced and had
more
> > > trouble with that dog than I ever gambled for. Why just the other
day
> > when
> > > I went for my first visit with the psychiatrist and she asked me,
>"What
> > > seems to be the trouble?"
> > >
> > > I replied, "Well, Sex has died and left my life. It's like losing > > > a
>best
> > > friend and it's so lonely."
> > >
> > > The doctor said, "Look Mister, you and I both know that sex isn't
>man's
> > > best friend. Why not get yourself a dog?"