NAMING THE FATHER FOR CHILD SUPPORT IN ENGLAND The following are all
>replies that British women have put on Child Support Agency forms in the
>section for listing the father's details:
>
> These are 'genuine' excerpts from the forms.
>
> 01. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was fathered
>by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B, but
>I believe that he was conceived on the same night.
>
> 02. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was
> > being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can
> > provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party
> > if this helps.
> >
> > 03. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was
> > conceived at a party at 3600 Grand Avenue where I had unprotected sex
> > with a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good
> > that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the father can you send
> > me his phone number? Thanks.
> >
> > 04. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives
> > a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels.
> > Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if
> > he's had it replaced.
> >
> > 05. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the
> > Pope confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is
> > Christ risen again.
> >
> > 06. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that
> > to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic
> > implications for the British economy. I am torn between doing right by
> > you and right by the country. Please advise.
> >
> > 07. I do not know who the father of my child was as all squaddies look
> > the same to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket.
> >
> > 08. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him
> > can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs?
> >
> > 09. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at
> > EuroDisney
> > - maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.
> >
> > 10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember
> > for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening.
> > If I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the
> > party at 146 Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilised.
> >
> > 11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all
> > when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart.
>