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a man's advice
Women Jokes
D Harris


OK GUYS .......Here is an idea for that not so perfect woman
And for the women on the email tree....listen up

When girls dont put out!!
This was written by a guy... its pretty damn smart.
I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women
differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars
I have never figured out why men think with their head and women
with their heart.
One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I
dont feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to
"Youre just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman
enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Cant you just love
me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend
time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a
big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she
tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldnt decide
one to take, so I told her wed just buy them all. She wanted new
shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each
We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair
of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must
have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think
she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she
doesnt even know how to play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "Thats fine, honey."
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this
is all dear, lets go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I
dont feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw
dropped with a
baffled, "WHAT?"
I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a
while. Youre just not in touch with my financial needs as a man
enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I
added,"Why cant you just love me for who I am and not for the
things I buy you?"

Apparently Im not having sex tonight either....but at least she
knows Im smarter than her.

Alright girls. Forward this on if you agree. Hell even if you
disagree,forward it on.
Men, forward this on this because you have balls

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