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annual Stella awards
Category:
Funny News
Rating:
0
Contributor:
rettoc
 JOKE TEXT


It's once again time to review the winners of the annual Stella awards.
> >
> > The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee
>
> > on herself and successfully sued McDonalds. That case inspired the Stella
>
> > Awards for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in the United States.
> >
> > 5th place (Tied)
> > Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her
> > peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running
> > inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably
> > surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving toddler was Ms.
> > Robertson's son.
> >
> > 5th place (Tied)
> > 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses
> > when his neighbour ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman
> > apparently did not notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when
>he
> > was trying to steal the hubcaps.
> >
> > 4th Place
> > Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas was awarded $14,500 and medical
> > expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his neighbour's Beagle dog.
>
> > The Beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award was less
> > than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been a little
>provoked
> > at the time as Mr. Williams, who had climbed over the fence into the yard,
>
> > was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.
> >
> > 3rd place
> > A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster,
> > Pennsylvania $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her
> > coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had
> > thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.
> >
> > 2nd Place
> > Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware sued the owner of a nightclub in a
> > neighbouring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and
> > knocked out two of her front teeth. This occurred whilst Ms. Walton was
> > trying to crawl in through the window of the Ladies Room to avoid paying
> > the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.
> >
> > And now for the winner
> > This year's runaway winner was Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City,
> > Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a new Winnebago motor-home. On his
>Trip
> > home from an OU football game, having driven onto the freeway, he set the
> > cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the drivers seat to go into the
> > back and make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the RV left the
> > freeway, crashed and overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not
> > advising him in the owner's manual that he could not actually do this.
>The
> > jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new Winnebago Motor Home. The company
> > actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit just in case
>there
> > were any other complete morons buying their recreation vehicles.
> >


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